The shifting meaning of the mistress: from social title to kept woman
The word 'mistress' once signaled high social status and respect. Over centuries, it transformed into a term for the 'other woman'—a role that ranged from powerful political influencers in European courts to women maintained by wealthy men for sexual pleasure.
Originally, 'mistress' served as the feminine counterpart to 'mister,' used to denote a woman of high social standing, such as the wife of a homeowner. However, the term's historical association with 'kept women' emerged as a way to describe women whose living expenses were paid by wealthy men to ensure their availability for sexual pleasure. This role was often an occupation for younger women who might eventually marry into higher ranks.
In the 17th and 18th centuries, the practice of keeping mistresses was not limited to royalty; any man with sufficient wealth could participate. In the courts of Versailles and Whitehall, certain women wielded immense political influence. The French concept of the 'maîtresse-en-titre,' or official mistress, saw figures like Madame de Pompadour exerting significant power over monarchs like Louis XV. These relationships were often 'open secrets' within the aristocracy.
The social dynamics of these relationships were complex and often dictated by class. While a wealthy merchant might keep a mistress, a woman taking a socially inferior lover was historically viewed as more scandalous than the reverse. By the 19th century, the narrative shifted; Romantics like George Eliot lived in non-marital unions as a form of independence from middle-class morality, specifically choosing not to be 'kept.'
Today, the term has largely lost its financial connotation. In modern contexts, 'mistress' refers to a female lover of a married man, regardless of whether she is married herself or receives financial support. The distinction between a 'kept woman' and a prostitute remains a significant theme in 18th-century literature, such as in the works of Daniel Defoe and John Cleland.
Source: Mistress (lover)
